Wellbeing and Care

Identity and distress are different things

Being a therian or otherkin is not a mental disorder, and most people who are one or the other live steady, ordinary lives. It is equally true that therians and otherkin are people, and people get anxious, low, isolated and overwhelmed.

Two mistakes are worth avoiding. The first is to treat the identity as the problem whenever something is wrong. The second is to treat the identity as an explanation that makes other help unnecessary. Low mood is low mood, whatever one's theriotype, and it deserves proper attention.

When to seek help

Please speak to a doctor or a qualified mental health professional if any of the following is true of you or of someone you care about:

• Sadness, numbness or anxiety that lasts for weeks and gets in the way of daily life.
• Thoughts of self-harm or of not wanting to be alive.
• A real belief that your body is physically changing into an animal's, or seeing and hearing things that others do not. This is not what therianthropy is, and it needs prompt medical care.
• Periods of lost time, or finding you have done things you cannot remember.
• Urges to hurt yourself, another person or an animal.
• Not eating or sleeping properly, or withdrawing from everyone.
• Species dysphoria so strong that it colors most of your days.

Talking to a professional

Many people put off seeking help because they fear being laughed at or misjudged. A few things may make it easier.

• You can begin with the difficulty, not the identity. "I have been very low for two months" is a complete and sufficient opening.
• If you choose to mention it, plain words work best. For example: "I have always had a strong sense of identifying as an animal. I know I am physically human. That is not what I have come about, but I would like you to know it."
• A good practitioner is interested in how you are, not in arguing about who you are. If you are not listened to, you are entitled to see someone else.
• If you are under eighteen, a parent, guardian, school counselor or family doctor is the usual way in.

Everyday care

Therians and otherkin who have lived contentedly for many years tend to mention the same handful of things.

• Time outdoors. Regular, unhurried, and in whatever green place is within reach.
• Movement. Walking, running, swimming, climbing: something that lets the body feel capable.
• Making things. Drawing, writing, carving, sewing. Giving the inner animal a form on paper is an old and reliable comfort.
• Company. At least one person who knows and does not mind. It need not be another therian.
• A whole life. Friends, study or work, interests that have nothing to do with identity. The animal is part of you. It is not all there is of you.
• Rest from the screen. Hours of other people's opinions about what you are seldom leave anyone feeling better.

The contemplation garden offers a few minutes of quiet for when it is wanted.

Staying safe online

Much of community life happens online, and many of those taking part are young. The ordinary rules apply with full force.

• Keep your full name, address, school and location private.
• Be cautious of anyone who is quick to tell you what you are, who claims special knowledge or powers, or who wants to move a conversation somewhere private.
• No genuine friend or mentor will ask for photographs, secrecy or money.
• You may leave any group that makes you uneasy. You owe no one an explanation.
• If someone threatens or pressures you, tell a trusted adult and report it to the platform.

Looking after the body

• Quadrobics puts real load on wrists, shoulders and knees. Warm up, build up gradually, practice on grass, and stop when something hurts.
• Masks and gear should never restrict breathing or vision where that could be dangerous, such as near roads or water.
• Wild animals are wild. Feeling kinship with wolves, foxes, deer or birds of prey does not make it safe to approach, feed or handle them, for you or for them.
• Plants and potions named in werewolf folklore include some of the most poisonous in the world. None should be touched, tasted or brewed. See signs and cures.
• Night walks are a pleasure. Tell someone where you are going, and carry a light and a telephone.

When others are unkind

Mockery and bullying do real harm, and no one should have to bear them alone. If it is happening at school or at work, tell someone with the authority to act. You are not obliged to tell anyone about your identity, and choosing privacy is not dishonesty. Many therians share it only with a few trusted people, and some with nobody, and live perfectly well.

A necessary note

The keepers of this library are not doctors or therapists. This page offers general information and is not a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. If you are worried about your health or someone else's, please consult a qualified professional.